Response:

Thanks for writing. Your youth director is very wise in that regard. The Bible tells us that the Bereans were more noble than the believers of Thessalonica because they "searched the Scriptures daily, whether those things were so".

The Bible contains many references to pre-marital sexual activity. Some of them are as follows.

Genesis 2:24: "Therefore shall a man leave his father and mother and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh". Note that being "one flesh" is reserved for the marriage relationship. I

Corinthians 6:16 states that anyone who is joined to a harlot has become "one flesh" with her. Therefore, the sex act constitutes "one flesh", and is only for a married couple.

I Thes 4:3 states "For this is the will of God, even your sanctification, that ye should abstain from fornication."

Verse 6 goes on to warn that no man should "defraud" his brother in this area. To defraud is to overstep the line between what belongs to you and what does not belong to you.

Since I Corinthians 7:4 indicates that the wife's body belongs to her husband, and the husband's body belongs to his wife, it would be defrauding to give that which belongs to your future spouse to someone else, or to take that which belongs to someone else's future spouse. Some may say at this point, "But we're going to get married, so this person IS my future spouse". Since engagements breakup everyday, no one knows for sure who their spouse will be until the wedding ceremony. Therefore, it is wrong to have pre-marital relations even with your fiance.

Galatians 5:19 states that the works of the flesh include "adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lasciviousness".

Hebrews 13:4 states that "Marriage is honorable in all, and the bed (the marriage bed) undefiled, but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge". Sex within marriage is God's design. Sex outside of marriage (whether pre-marital or extra-marital) is wicked.

I Corinthians 7:2 teaches 'to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband". The solution to fornication is marriage, so fornication must be defined as pre-marital sex, which the Bible says is to be avoided.

Proverbs 5:18-20 indicate that a man is to be sexually satisfied with and by "the WIFE of thy youth". Though the passage is written to a man, the same would hold true for a woman as well.

I Corinthians 10:8 says "neither let us commit fornication". That is pretty self-explanatory.

Ephesians 5:3 commands, "But fornication and all uncleanness...let it not be once named among you, as becometh saints". In other words, a believer would never want to taint his life by being involved in sexual impurity.

Lastly, Colossians 3:5 says that we as Christians are to "mortify" (kill or destroy) some things in our lives. The first one listed is fornication.

It is very clear that pre-marital sex is sin. Don't fall into its trap (Proverbs 7:22-23, 5:22-23). Don't let someone convince you that you should do it for "love", because the greatest love you can have for someone is a desire that they be in a right relationship with God. Anyone who wants you to violate the commands of scripture does not love you. They love themselves, and you don't want to be with a person like that.

Thanks for your desire to know what the scriptures say. May the Lord bless you.

By Dr Mark Montgomery Ambassador Baptist Church 1926 Babcock Blvd Pittsburgh, PA 15209 (412)477-3210